It’s official! Becca is 1!
We love you, Becca! Happy birthday, sweet girl!
(I’ll post more on the birthday festivities later.)
June 21, 2009
June 19, 2009
Just because she’s cute…
…and I don’t have time for words right now.
From our trip to D.C. back in May – at lunch with Katy, Sarah, and Hunter:
And at the Natinoal Zoo – clearly Hunter liked it better than Becca!
And cozy with Sarah and Hunter in his nursery:
Oh, to be a Methodist preachers’ kid in June…watching Baby Einstein while I packed the car for the FIRST Annual Conference of the summer:
And at the hotel – “Mom, you’re not REALLY going to bathe me in here, are you?” (No; we took her bathtub with us. Now a necessary item, even if it isn’t travel-friendly.)
So glad to be back home and back to the routine:
Sitting up like a big girl in the outfit she picked out herself – she LOVES red and polka dots!
Getting educated by watching CBS Evening News with Katie Couric during her dinner:
On to Annual Conference #2 – hanging out in her “boat” while we loaded the car at the end of our 4th trip this month:
Sitting in her other “boat,” playing with Oliver the Octopus that her Great-great-aunt Susie gave her – she loved it so much that she refused to look up for several minutes! (Again, with the red polka dots, right?)
This is her new sand and water table from her Nana and G-Diddy. Note that it is not really a table now b/c it has no legs b/c Becca is tiny. Pretty sure that she won’t be able to reach it when it is fully set up until she is gearing up for Kindergarten. But she had a blast with it anyway! Not every kid gets to sit IN her water table. There are perks to being itty bitty.
My eldest child has discovered the boppy:
Eating is still a challenge, so I gave up the other day and just let her play in her pears:
By the end of it, Becca was so covered in food that Sasha stalked her until I undressed her and gave Sasha her clothes to clean off. Sasha wouldn’t let Buster near her. Sasha is what you call “highly food-motivated.”
June 10, 2009
Pre-conception visit
Hold on, now, don’t get your panties in a wad…we’re not talking ANY time soon. Becca’s not even crawling yet, for Pete’s sake!
But, John and I (mostly I, as the designated worrier in the relationship) wanted to meet with the maternal-fetal specialist to talk about what a future pregnancy might look like BEFORE deciding whether we’d like to try again or not. I need as much information as possible, and I feel like we got it! It was such a good appointment. We spent nearly 1.5 hours with Dr. Carpenter at Vandy (in the new 100 Oaks location…interesting) From Dr. Carpenter’s bio:
Dr. Carpenter’s clinical and research interests include fetal ultrasound and prenatal diagnosis, fetal growth restriction, immunology in pregnancy, and placental function. She received her undergraduate degree from Vanderbilt University and her medical degree from the University of Tennessee. She completed her residency and a Maternal-Fetal Medicine fellowship at the University of Cincinnati College of Medicine where she also was a Women’s Reproductive Health Research Scholar.
Hello, exactly who we needed to talk to! (Remember, pre-eclampsia is a form of placental dysfunction.) Here’s the recap I posted on a discussion board for preemie parents. I’m including the background paragraph just to give you a refresher and hit some points that may have gotten lost in the drama – some of which I have just now come to understand, as I was too overwhelmed by what was going on to really understand the medical part of it. So, if you want to cut to the chase, just skip the next paragraph.
The background: Becca was born at 27.6 with severe IUGR (370 grams, 9.5 inches). It all seems to have come back to the placental issues. At first it was really big, but by the time she was delivered, it was normal size and extremely “mature” (read: dying). It literally fell apart after they took her. There was also a velamentous (sp?) cord insertion, basically meaning that the umbilical cord was just barely hanging on to the placenta. That’s a problem. I had a borderline result for an clotting disorder in pg, but was cleared of any issue outside of pregnancy. In the last few weeks of pregnancy, we saw reverse-end diastolic flow (super bad problems with blood flow through the placenta, keeping her from getting the oxygen she needed – an indication for immediate delivery), severe decelerations (of her heart rate – also an indication for immediate delivery, had she been big enough to be “viable”), high bp, protein in my urine, some facial swelling that we thought was normal pregnancy weight gain (b/c I had just started gaining weight b/c of prolonged morning sickness), and shortness of breath. I was admitted on 6.16, finally diagnosed with pre-e (I have moved out of state 2 days before and thus changed doctors, thank goodness), put on hospital bedrest for the duration of the pregnancy, set up camp (brought in the dvd player and everything!) but developed HELLP syndrome by 6.21. Becca was born by emergency c-section soon after. I was put on magnesium sulfate (to prevent seizures and stroke) and stayed on it for 24 hours after her birth, so I didn’t get to see her until she was 26 hours old. My body fairly quickly returned to normal, and I was discharged when Becca was 3 days old. (Apparently, I was really sick, and many moms with HELLP have to stay longer, and some have permanent damage – from stroke or seizure or liver and kidney damage. Scary. Glad I didn’t know that at the time.)
So, the doctor’s conclusions: trying again is certainly not unreasonable, though the risk of another pre-term birth is higher than average. Her partner put my risk of developing pre-e again at 55%, though it’s perfectly possible that I’ll have a normal pregnancy or if the pre-e develops again it will be less severe and/or later – like full-term later. I’ll be watched closely, and b/c I live an hour from the hospital (Vandy – closer to community hospitals, but with my risks, baby and I will both need to be at Vandy), if I start showing signs (protein, spike in bp, etc), there’s a very good likelihood that I would be put on hospital bedrest, possibly for weeks. She’s confident that I would be monitored closely enough that the chance of causing permanent or severe damage to my own body is very low, since they would deliver when my health was at risk and be equipped to stabilize me. (Of course, there is still a risk to me.) She told us that placental problems lead to pre-e (I had never heard that before!), so it may just be that this particular placenta would have caused the same cascade of events in any woman, and the next time around would be fine. Or, I could have a genetic predisposition to developing pre-e (of which HELLP is actually just a variant), even though there is no actual family history. Also, since I have PCOS, I am slightly more predisposed to develop pre-e, as would be someone with pre-existing diabetes or cardiovascular issues.
While she insists that there is nothing I could have done to prevent the problems from forming, there are some things I can do to try to tip the scales in our favor next time. The biggest thing, she said, is to get into the best shape possible. I’m carrying some extra weight (had lost 15-20 pounds pumping, but gained it back during the RSV lock-down of winter), so the closer I am to my ideal body weight when I get pregnant, the better my chances are. I’m hoping to lose 20 pounds in the next 6 months. Related to the weight is exercise – obviously, exercise will help me lose the weight, but she said that exercise can make a difference on its own – as in regardless of how much you weigh, your chances are better if you exercise regularly before pregnancy – something about oxidation. Yay for the Wii Fit! Not sure how they would recommend exercising in a high-risk pregnancy – last time it was kind of out of the question b/c I would throw up just walking, but she emphasized that before pregnancy, it’s really important. Also, since having had pre-e and HELLP puts you in a higher risk category for later non-pregnancy-related cardiovascular issues, it’s a good idea to get a handle on a good diet and exercise program now anyway, while I have the added motivation. Also, if you remember, my stress level during my pregnancy was ridiculously, off the charts high: preparing to move, working as a chaplain (on the perinatal loss team, even), doing a residency, working evenings as the ONLY chaplain in the hospital, 2-3 overnight on-calls each week, being pregnant for the first time, being told we were going to lose the baby…kind of insane, really. My life may not be easy now, and I definitely stay busy, but it’s much more regular-life stress now, which is manageable. As far as how they would medically manage the pregnancy differently, she talked about baby aspirin (probably beginning at 8 weeks gestation) and calcium supplements. There is a theory that suggests that some other vitamins and minerals (A, D, and anti-oxidants, I think??) could make a difference, but, unfortunately, the latest studies haven’t found benefits to them. I would, of course, be seen more regularly and at least co-managed by a regular OB and a maternal-fetal specialist (or I could go straight to the MFM folks – good thing about Vandy is that they are all in the same group, so communication is better than in some settings – like my last set of doctors!). I’m sure I’d be taking my BP at home, but she said that blood pressure meds don’t stop the progression of pre-e; they just protect you from the effects of high blood pressure (stroke, etc.) – which is definitely important! – but wouldn’t have solved my issues before.
Phew. I think that’s about it. It was really, really, really helpful to talk through everything with her and see how she – the pre-eclampsia specialist – thought all the general information that I’ve read applies to my case specifically. I feel like I finally have some answers, even though she didn’t tell us all that much new about what happened with Becca. It seems to make more sense now, though. Maybe I’m just now ready to make sense of it all in my mind. She was very patient with us, and I feel a lot better informed – both about what did happen and what may happen in the future. Again, we’re not talking near future here. At the VERY least, we’ll wait until after our trip to Malaysia…pretty sure I don’t need to travel internationally pregnant now! In the meantime, I’ve got plenty on my hands with our crazy adorable Becca, about whom I’m hoping to post soon. Oh – Dr. Carpenter also gave me a Rx for Zithromax, so hopefully I’ll be able to breathe again soon. Turns out my sinuses really don’t agree with living in the country.
Gotta run – my little miracle is waking up! Will post pictures of her soon!
June 4, 2009
It’s official!
Daddy was FINALLY fully ordained last night!
After years and years of preparation, John was ordained, and Becca helped! (For you non-Methodists – or UM’s not up on the polity of your church – this is a big step…loosely akin to getting tenure, you could say.) No more “day trips” to Kentucky for residency meetings, no more residency retreats in which he is (almost literally) held captive, no more theology, call, and doctrine papers…he’s DONE!
John, we are so proud of you!
Here are pictures: the first is the actual moment of ordination – notice Becca and her ducky wubbanub got to be onstage and lay hands on him, too! Standing to the right of me are Cindy Green, John’s youth minister from South Ashland and Lee Padgett, the director of Aldersgate Camp – quite possibly John’s favorite place in the world.
The second is the family shot with daddy’s new stole – in Becca’s favorite color.
Our dear friend Rebecca was also ordained, right before John. We worked with her at Christ Church, and now she’s Waldo’s mom. Congrats, Rebecca!
A few others in my commissioning class were also ordained. I am so happy for them! It was great to see them finish this process, having come in to the conference together. Congrats to Kaye, Phil, and William!
(In case you are wondering, I’m at least 2 years out from this milestone. Because of everything that has happened, I’m off their schedule. But it will definitely help not having both of us have to travel at the same time for residency stuff.)
May 17, 2009
Picture Pages, Picture Pages…
…time to get your crayons and your PEN-cils! Bill Cosby, anyone?
Um, I feel like I got hit by a Mack truck of a Sunday, so I’ve got very few words, but I know some of you have been wondering, so I thought I’d let you know that we are all alive and well. We are still struggling with the whole eating thing, and now we’ve got daily projectile vomiting to go withthe medication administration (which has to happen 3x a day), so it’s a good thing that Becca’s got so many clothes and that I rarely get out of my pajamas anyway. Becca’s also been put on Benadryl for allergies (at least temporarily), so Buster is now the only one in the house not on allergy medicine. Somehow, we always manage to live somewhere with lots and lots of pollen (seriously, middle TN, Louisville, and – the king of all allergies – Atlanta). Becca has started physical therapy, and we go for our third appointment tomorrow afternoon. She’s a month or two behind (her corrected age) on her gross motor skills, so we’re working on that. (She’s not crawling or sitting by herself.) All in all, life is good, even though our doctor-less streak was broken by last week’s allergy visit. Oh well. We’re down to 5 weeks without an appointment now (but still weekly physical therapy and developmental therapy (EI)). Anyway, I’m out of words (gasp!), so here are some pictures. Oh, and when I get some sleep and a day with more than one meal, I’ll tell you about our BIG vacation to D.C., including Becca’s first plane ride! Wow! I’ve included one picture from it below to remind me to write more about it later.
Stats: 11 months chronological/8 months corrected: 12 pounds, 1 ounce.
Oh, and one more thing – Becca’s being baptized on Sunday morning, May 24th. We’d love to have you join us! If you’d like directions and details, please e-mail (or leave a comment and I’ll e-mail you). I’ll be sure to post pictures of the big event – including Becca’s introduction to her 6 cousins 6 and under!
From D.C.: Becca and Hunter playing with Bruno, the horse-dog (who is a very, very good sport):
And this is the part wherein I let my dog eat my preemie. Okay, not really. Buster is actually chewing on the toy that is lying underneath Becca, and she is pulling on his ear – a favorite pastime. Sasha is patiently guarding them both. You can see my leg in the ubiquitous and aforementioned pajama pants.
And while we’re on the subject of canines, here’s another pose that looks slightly precarious but is a relatively common scene in our home:
Really, the dogs are GREAT with Becca. When they get sick of her pulling their ears, they just walk away. And they like that she rarely finishes her food and that mommy absentmindedly leaves it sitting out while getting her bottle ready.
A couple of daddy-daughter shots. The first is just ridiculously cute. Look at how she is starting up at him!
The next is our Kentucky girl’s rite of passage: her first Derby. (Yes, she is simultaneously a Tennessee girl and Kentucky girl.)
And while she skipped the Mint Julep, she did, of course, have a Derby hat:
And while we are showcasing hats, here’s 2 more:
Clearly, Becca is ready for the beach. Or perhaps her mother is. Is it July yet?
And here she is looking spiffy for the Portland Strawberry Festival this weekend. Seriously, does it get any cuter than this?
Granted, this was her second outfit because she vomited all over her strawberry overalls, but I think she still managed to make it cute.
And, finally, Becca’s favorite new bath pose. She’s also learned to pick up her bath toys with her feet, transfer them to her hands, and (of course) stick them in her mouth. She may have a future in synchronized swimming.
April 13, 2009
Fun Miscellany
Okay, I’m still on my Holy Week/Confirmation/Easter hangover (of the sober variety, of course), so there will not likely be any rhyme or reason to this post (and you’ll be lucky if you get complete sentences), but there’s a lot going on to mention here. So, in no particular order:
Easter! Thanks to Grandma and Granddaddy Speas, Becca got to come to church for the first part of the Easter service! Mom was worried about bringing her even for that part – because she tends to be noisy – but I assured her that there was no way that she would be heard over the band. Am I right, Bethpagers? We’ve got some serious volume on Sunday mornings – at least at 8:30. So mom and dad brought her a little before the service started so that folks could see our adorable little curiosity and then took her home before the sermon so that she could nap. We’re trying to teach her that napping during the sermon is impolite. 
And thanks to Nana Dana, Becca was all dolled up, complete with matching bloomers and bonnet. I love that the hat barely fits her when everything else is big because her head is nearly a full size ahead of her body. Too funny. Here she is:
And here’s all three of us. Please ignore the circles under our eyes. It was a long week. By the way, this was my second Easter outfit. The first one got soaked when I baptized 5 youth – by immersion!
Becca got her LAST Synagis shot today! Hooray! These are the wicked-expensive shots that are supposed to minimize the danger of an RSV infection if she were to get the virus, but so far, we haven’t had to put them to the test, thank goodness. RSV season runs October through April here, so she’s home free until next fall, when she will likely qualify for the shots (and the RSV house arrest that goes with them) for another year. I say she’s home free until the fall, but I just mean that she’s free of the Synagis shots. While the RSV risk decreases dramatically here in the summer, it doesn’t go away, as my sweet nephew Taylor knows (he caught it in August!), so we’ll still be vigilant about the hand-washing and (when in public) hand-swatting-awaying, but she is getting to go out a little bit. We actually went out to dinner on Sunday night even though we were still full from the yummy meal that my mom had made because I love to eat out and we figured the crowds would be pretty nonexistent on Easter night. We were right, and even though I didn’t like my food, John and I had a great time playing trivia at BW-3’s, and Becca loved staring at all of the many, many t.v.’s they had on. But back to the shot. The nurse who came to the house today was the same nurse who gave Becca the first Synagis shot she got at home in November. This particular nurse hadn’t been back since, and we figured out that at 11 pounds, 6 ounces, Becca was fully twice as big as she was the last time Kathy saw her. Wow!
We had some crazy Tennessee weather this weekend. For those of you who aren’t local, Tennessee actually gets quite a few tornados this time of year, and sometimes they can be really bad. I remember the week before we moved to Brentwood, when I was in 3rd grade, tornados came through on Christmas Eve, I think. I say I remember, but I didn’t live here and was only in 3rd grade anyway, so go with my fuzzy recollections of the stories. Then when I was a senior in high school – and this one I remember – tornadoes ripped through downtown Nashville, doing quite a bit of damage. Ron got us youth together, and we helped clean up Tulip Street UMC. And somebody brought us amazing cheesecake from the Fatherland Street Bakery. Good times. And then last year (again, before I moved here), there were some terrible tornadoes that hit our little community, though most of the damage was to the neighboring communities. Our church was a disaster relief distribution/organization site. I’m sorry that I missed seeing our church in action like that! But we probably had enough drama of our own this time last year. Okay, I know we did. So, anyway, we get tornadoes and they can be pretty bad. Well, some hit on Friday (which made for very cool ambiance at the Good Friday service), and mom and Becca crawled into the bathtub to wait them out. They missed us, thankfully, but thank goodness mom is as concerned as I am and had my little one tucked in the tub with her! Dad was on dog and weather tracking patrol, so they had the situation under control. Here’s what I came home to:
Becca is not a fan of having the sun in her eyes, and she’s going to the beach this summer (and she just has a mom who thinks kids should be outside as much as possible), so I found these adorable sunglasses for her. They came with the headband and some hairbows. I’m not sure what I think about the headband, as I’ve always been opposed to them, but it may not be an issue much longer – check out the second picture below. She really seemed to like the glasses – she took them off a couple of times to chew on them, but then she left them on and just kept playing. Too cute.
She's getting hair!
One positive thing about being the mother of a micro-preemie is that you don’t take anything with your baby for granted. I mean, yes, I whine some days when she doesn’t nap and all, but in general, there are a lot of things that are just h0-hum and expected for “regular” babies that are way more exciting for Becca. (More on this another day.) I almost cried when I caught this picture:
Do you see her left hand? On the little spinny wheel? Doesn’t it make you cry, too? This exersaucer came from our wonderful, fabulous EI teacher, Cindy. One of the challenges that we’ve been running into is that Becca doesn’t fit the toys that are developmentally appropriate for her. For example, she wasn’t able to reach the dangley things (wow, I’m eloquent tonight) on her bouncy even though she was able to focus and intentionally reach for and bat at things. So we’ve had to adapt. But here is proof that she has finally grown into her exersaucer! (Well, kind of. She can only reach about half the things, but it’s progress.) She LOVES spinning this little wheel. It made me so happy to see something cooperating for her when she’s been trying so hard! Thanks, Cindy!
Okay, just a few more quick ones:
Here’s Becca doing her Daddy impression, complete with sweet potato red beard:
Twins, right? The great news is that we finally got some of those sweet potatoes IN her! And she’s eaten nearly a jar of pears today! This is a HUGE step! We’ve been struggling with solid food for over 3 months now, and she’s finally getting the hang of it! Can’t wait to give her chocolate ice cream!
Here’s an example of our passing on our issues to our children. Thus begins Becca’s addiction to board games:
She was very interested in Daddy’s cards, but refused to tell me what they were.
And just to prove that I do exist (because all the pictures seem to be Becca and John!):
And to compare her size to her early tub pictures:
See, she’s a “tubby” girl! HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
Wow. On that note, I’m going to bed. G’night!
Oh! It’s not too late to contribute to Becca’s Team’s March for Babies! Visist www.marchforbabies.org/BeccaHill !
April 5, 2009
Super Quick Update
Okay, I’m dying for a quick nap before youth group this evening, so I’m going to keep this really brief (and I mean it this time!). Becca had her swallow study done this week, and she did great. Her swallow is fine, but she needs some helps knowing when to swallow, so Gwen gave us some tips. However, she has since then become very tight lipped whenever I bust out the baby food, so the struggle to eat continues. She’s almost 7 months past her due date now, so it’s time to get some more nutrients in her!
I’ll backtrack and explain why all of this is a challenge for her and why the study was so important – and why Gwen is our hero – later, but I know some of you have been waiting for the study results, so here you go.
By the way, it’s not too late to donate to the March of Dimes! Our secure donation site is www.marchforbabies.org/BeccaHill . Thanks to all of you who have already donated! We’re getting close to our goal of $1000!
March 30, 2009
March for Babies!
This week marks one year from that awful day on which we received our baby girl’s awful prognosis. Dr. Fines’ exact words were, “I think we need to be prepared to lose this baby.” I was crushed. After calling John (who was in Costa Rica at the time) and stopping at Mejier to buy some pink sleepers, I took a nap. Here’s an excerpt of how I described that afternoon on this blog:
“The thing about taking a nap is that life doesn’t really change while you’re asleep. That whole “While You Were Sleeping” concept – not so much. When I woke up that afternoon – and for the next several mornings – I experienced that moment that many people who go through some kind of tragedy often describe. For about 30 seconds after I woke up, I thought everything was okay. And then I remembered. ‘I think we need to be prepared to lose this baby.’ Those next few days were some of the hardest of my life.”
Tonight, after countless perinatalogists visits, 121 days in the NICU, and 5 wonderful months at home together, our precious little Becca is sleeping in one of those pink sleepers, just down the hall from me.
As you know, our family has been touched by the March of Dimes mission to prevent birth defects, premature birth and infant mortality. That’s why we have formed Itty Bitty Becca’s Team to raise money and participate in March for Babies. Since you were a part of the team that cheered her through our darkest days, we want you to officially be part of Itty Bitty Becca’s Team! There are two ways you can join: by walking with us on Sunday, April 19, or by sponsoring our event with a financial contribution.
Contributing to our team online is fast, easy and secure. You can donate directly from my personal webpage with a credit/debit card or PayPal. If you prefer, I can also accept cash or check. Just click the appropriate box on my webpage. My March for Babies webpage is http://www.marchforbabies.org/BeccaHill .
Or, if you prefer and are able to do so, we would love to have you walk with us in the March for Babies! We are participating in the Nashville walk on Sunday, April 19 at 2:00 at Cenntennial Park. If the weather is good and the germs remain at bay, Litte Miss Becca will be “walking” with us, too! (Of course, you can walk AND contribute, too!) You can also sign up to walk with us on the website.
Our family knows firsthand the challenges associated with prematurity. It is important to find out why premature birth happens and what can be done to prevent it. By raising money, ongoing research to answer these critical questions is funded. When you support our Itty Bitty Becca’s Team, you show you care and you give hope for defeating premature birth and other threats to babies. Becca is doing great now, but all you have to do is look back at her early days on the blog to see how close we came to losing our little girl, all because of still unexplained complications. But every day, the folks at March of Dimes are getting us closer to an explanation – and to a better outcome for the rest of our children!
Please join us and millions of compassionate people across the country who support March for Babies each year. We need your help. Visit my webpage and sponsor our event or to sign up to walk with us!
With your support, there’s hope. Thank You!
Love,
Nancy, John, and – of course – Itty Bitty Baby Becca
My personal Web page address for donations is…
http://www.marchforbabies.org/BeccaHill
p.s. I know that money is tight right now, so if you can’t contribute, no worries! Just say a prayer for our little girl, her fellow preemies, and the doctors, nurses, and researchers who are helping save their precious lives!
First Picture
The March of Dimes mission is to improve the health of babies by
preventing birth defects, premature birth and infant mortality. Becca (in her very first picture above) is one of those babies.
March 23, 2009
All things green…
Pinchers ready for St. Patty's party-poopers
May the force be with you.
Not green - but a cute tummy time shot
March 16, 2009
Bookworm
Mommy’s favorite bookworm:
Becca loves to read. She’ll sit there forever it seems like, as long as she’s able to look at the pictures. We try to read everyday. Because she’s a genius and all. (It doesn’t hurt that mom used to work in a kids’ library and was a bookworm herself, either.)
And a quick snuggle shot:
